I cannot believe how long it has been since I have logged into this blog and felt like writing. Really, December was my last post? Oh my, so much has happened since then. Like this one big thing - I found I was pregnant!
That's right folks. My husband and I are expecting our first little one in 3 weeks and 5 days. If you wondered where I went off to, I entered Pregnancy Land. I have not felt like myself for most of it and finally I've been itching to feel like myself again. "Feel like myself again"....I wonder how that is going to work after our little man gets here.
According to the date of my last post it wasn't too long after that I found out I was expecting. My husband and I were overjoyed, scared, excited and a bunch of other emotions. Okay, I think he was mostly in shock for a bit. A lot of things changed once I found out that I was going to be a mommy; from my body to my emotions. I'm apologize to my readers because you were important to me. However, I couldn't think of sharing because for most of my pregnancy I was so afraid and miserable.
Christmas Day, which was 5 or 6 weeks into my pregnancy, I spotted a lot and it scared me so much. I thought that I did something to make it happen. Even though I was only pregnant for that short amount of time the thought of losing my tiny miracle gripped me with fear that I couldn't describe. I drove straight home from a family dinner, drank lots of water and put my feet up. I didn't want to do anything to jeopardize my pregnancy.
I was good for another few weeks, everything seemed to be fine and then morning sickness hit. Let me rephrase- it was EVERY MOMENT OF THE DAY sickness. I've read a funny little quote somewhere that men were the ones to give that awful period during a woman's pregnancy the name "morning sickness" and I would be inclined to agree. Those men got it wrong. I was miserable for so long. I was not enjoying a moment of having this little jelly bean grow inside of me. I think I lost a good 10 pounds during that time. This kind of helped me in the long run because my doctor only wanted me to gain around 10-15 pounds during my entire pregnancy. If you don't remember, I wasn't exactly at my goal weight when I got pregnant.
Being pregnant during your first year of teaching is no joke. While I worked hard to keep my sickness hidden from my students, it took every bit of energy I had within me to do it. I didn't think it was fair to feel miserable in front of them. I still wanted to be a great teacher for them. With that and and everything that we call life I was pretty exhausted once I got home. I ate mashed potatoes or toast when I could. There were days when I could stomach chicken soup. In the end I really did not feel up to continuing a blog about feeling and getting healthy when I felt so miserable. I just wanted to focus on getting through my pregnancy as healthy as possible and that turned into me shutting out a lot of things in my life because I became overly cautious.
With the end in sight I am beginning to get excited about continuing my weight loss journey again. I realize that I will have new challenges to face. Right now I'm jobless (budget cuts in my county led to that), I'll have a newborn to take care of and I'll still have the role of a wife to fill. It's going to be a challenge, but I like a challenge. I have so much to look forward to and be thankful for.
Right now I have this picture in my head of my son sitting in his baby seat in the living room. I'm watching him and working on squats while making faces at him. They're probably faces of pain because, oh my goodness I feel so out of use. I feel like the Tin Man when Dorothy found him. Anyway, the faces of pain will probably amuse him. Even though I'm working hard, it hurts and even though I'm most likely sweaty I know I'm happy. I getting healthy again while making exercise the norm in my son's eyes. I'm excited to make that picture in my mind a reality.
So I'm back. I'm going to try to be better than ever. I left off doing well with 30 Day Shred, Weight Watchers and kickball and I'm going to pick it right back up again. I hope you'll join me on this continuing journey because the pit stop is so close to being over!